The Pan-Iowa Mall & Feed Store

Sent September 9, 1988
Postcard from Champaign, IL

My message: The selected location for the proposed Pan-Iowa Mall and Feed Store. After rigorous research, the developers picked this site for its proximity to modern transportation facilities, the absence of local environmental resistance, and, of course, cost. Plans are under development to import customers from all over the north-east-central-southern Iowa region.

The beneficial effects of radiation

Sent September 1, 1988
Postcard from Omaha, NE


My message: Evidence of the beneficial effects of nuclear power plant emissions was discovered near a Nebraska plant. Anticipated uses include an end to world hunger, breast enlargement, and increasing the brain mass of Democratic candidates. The photographer escaped just before those pictured were eaten by a large groundhog.

The Lemming & Tapir Pub

Sent April 10, 1990
Postcard from London


My message: Actually, London was clear and bright on the day this photo was taken. The photo, a blurred shot of the pavement outside the "Lemming and Tapir Pub", was taken as the photographer fell after what turned out to be too many pints.

Drive, fly, swim.

Sent October 2, 1989
Postcard of the 17 Mile Drive past the Pebble Beach Golf Club in Monterey, CA.


My message: Culminating in the 63 foot drop and the 8 fathom sink.